the mirror cracks
long jagged pieces trail across my face
i see the blood spider-webbing over my arms
i still don't feel pain
only numbness
i look at my fractured face in the mirror
who is this girl with raccoon eyes and bloody lips?
the knife still lays on my bed
waiting for me to grab it
to finally put an end to it all
i see the fractured image of my tear crawl down my cheek
the last thing i remember is the cold metal fast against my throat
and nothing
I'm a cutter
So
Why is it so wrong?
I barely feel any pain
When I drag a knife across my skin
So, I'm a cutter
Why do you care?
I'm not making you bleed
You don't have to feel the pain
That I feel, every day, every night
Yes, I'm a cutter
Are you going to make me stop?
It's a part of me now
I can't be stopped
It is my escape
See, I'm a cutter
Look at my scars
I tell you that cats made them
Do you believe me?
No? You just don't care enough to stop me
What if I'm a cutter?
I find joy in it
When I find joy in nothing else
I enjoy the blood dripping down my arm
Like tears dripping down my cheek
Stop me, I'm a cutter
But
I am the words that you left unsaid.
I am the thing hiding under your bed.
I am the whisper you seek in dreams,
I am the one who's not as he seems.
I am the girl with the tearaway grin;
I am the devil who's counting your sins.
I am the chill you feel at night.
I am the one slipping out of sight.
I am the blade that whispers your name.
I am the scars that kept you sane.
I am the blood creeping down your arm -
I am the one who helps you harm.
I am the solitude pressing down,
I am the one with a concerned frown.
I am the man who's face you can't see.
I am the needle which sets you free.
I am the fear consuming your soul
I am t
Attempt
A potent mixture of pills and drink,
Thrown up and washed down the kitchen sink,
Another night I want to die,
Another night I cannot try.
The flavour of Death is nothing new,
So many also have tasted it too,
The taste of paracetamol on thier tongues,
Of acrid smoke tainting the lungs.
Dried blood on your skin from the night,
The feeling of emptiness, out of sight.
Fill the hole with all this abuse,
While my mind wants to recluse.
All this pain inside my head,
No wonder I want to wind up dead.
"You can cut me, if you rather."
My voice was gentle and quite but you still gasped in surprise.
I suppose I should have made some noise to let you know I was there, but I had been standing in the bathroom's open doorway unnoticed for at least 2 minutes uncertain what to say or do...
I had found you, sitting on the bathroom floor, leaning back against the tub.
I watched you roll up your sleeve and choose the desired spot on your forearm.
I listened as you took deep breath then hold it before drawing the razor over and into your skin.
The ensuing hiss sounded more like a sigh and that's when I spoke.
I could keep silent no longer though o